Breaking up and getting back together, can it work? That is a question that a lot of people ask. It’s not uncommon to break up with someone and later regret the breakup and try to reconcile. The question is, will it work? The answer is, it depends…
It depends on many factors. Below is a list of some things you have to honestly consider before you get back together with your ex:
1) Why did you break up in the first place? If you broke up because of major differences in your outlooks and personalities and found that you were constantly clashing then getting back together would be a bad idea.
Neither of you will be able to completely change your personality. Nor should you. If you are just not compatible that won’t change. It’s time to move on and find someone you are more in sync with.
2) If the reason you broke up was fairly minor daily hassles you have to decide if either of you are willing, and able, to honestly discuss it and make the changes necessary to make the relationship work. If you think that the two of you are mature enough to have an honest discussion of the problems and work on fixing them then you might be able to make it work this time around.
3) Was there infidelity or abuse? For the most part, if either of these things were present you’re probably better off finding someone new. Most people don’t really change to a significant degree. If you or your ex is a cheater that pattern will more than likely continue unless extensive therapy is undertaken.
If abuse is the problem no one should be given a second chance to hit or hurt you again. Leave, and don’t look back. Hopefully your ex will get help and be able to overcome the problem but that type of treatment isn’t always successful and could take years, it’s time for you to move on for good.
Breaking up and getting back together, for the most part, can only be accomplished if you and your ex can be totally honest with yourself and each other. It’s not impossible to make changes but it can be challenging and unless both parties are in agreement and are committed to making the positive changes needed to make the relationship work it’s probably better to call it quits and move on.